Tuesday, April 19, 2011

i'm immune to caffeine :S

This is a really bad news to me, you see, my exam is around the corner, and i really really need something to keep me awake! and the thing is, i seem to be immune to caffeine! IT'S NOT WORKING AT ALL NOW! rather, its like a sleeping pill to me. Whenever i drink, i doze off. What the hell is this?GOSH!!! anything out there other than caffeine can keep me awake? :S

Hmmm...talking about coffee, i really miss Starbucks's beverage, green tea frapucinno with cream on top, hmmmm! i have a craving for my green tea =p and also my favorite cheese cake from Secret Recipe.. yum yum.. i just bought 2 on the way back from my Uni, durian cheese and banana baked cheese, yea, its fattening! I KNOW! gonna hit the gym later. eat + exercise, we should do it concurrently :p

Besides that, i feel kinda frustrated when all the part-time offers suddenly 'pop-up' like nowhere, and I CANT TAKE any one of them! T__T, why they always appear at the wrong time. Argghh. well, i should calm and be cool. Concentrate  on my studies right now, studies is my priority now, and i'm having my first exam next week, and i haven't started anything. yea, you could see walking Souxie Thanatos ( a vampire) seeking blood during day time with her pale face next week. Okay, i should not panic, 'everything is under my control' (try to convince myself,LOL) . Anyway, wish me luck!! =))

with love, xoxo

Thursday, April 7, 2011

My online diary

Wow...didn't know that there are people actually read my blog. GOSH..i'm shocked!and surprised too. To me, blogging is something like my online diary. Here i can say whatever i want, write down my thought and speak out my mind. Arrrhh...i accidentally leak my dirty little secret out,oppppssss!! nyek nyek nyek.... its kinda scary, feel like people have been stalking me ;p
Well, i'm just talking nonsense here since i have stop writing diary few years back!! LOL.. it's nothing legal here. Hmmm, sometimes i will write but not all of the time. I know its kinda boring to read stuff like that... hmmm.. it depends how the writer write it, as for me... i will write it like an assignment, so no jokes and no pictures. Hence, the article is 'as dry as a bone'.
My schedule is kinda tight this few days, nevertheless i still manage to party, not often but once a week. My life is like this, weekdays- study my ass off, i should say rush project paper and assignments my ass off. Tutorials and homeworks. Weekends- Drink and hang over / revision/ part-time. LOL. It has been ages since last time i visited cinema and k-box. I know i shouldn't live like that, it's unhealthy. But i really need 'destress' time. =(
Occasionally volleyball and gym session let me feel i have my life back, at least i'm doing something healthy! HAHA...Well, at least once a week, i like to exercise. When i get heart pumping and some sweat comes to the surface i feel like my body is getting a workout. I feel kinda excited, just don't know the reason though! I know some of us are really lazy to work out, they rather spend their time on drinking or sleeping...whatsoever. C'on guys! I know its kinda useless but i have to say this, regular physical activity provides enormous health benefits, it helps reduce heart disease, cancer, other diseases and metabolic conditions. One thing i do it as i want to be healthy( LOL) nah, its not my real purpose, i believe that exercise can make the best of my body shape. I do not believe in diet like what other girls do. Instead, I think that we should control the excessive taking of high cholesterol and carbohydrate food. I seldom have food in high cholesterol, of course i have a craving for food like burger, Macdonald, KFC, bah kut teh and so on. I'm trying to control myself too...arrrhhhh... Anyway, its time to work out! sweat SWEAT!

Monday, April 4, 2011

Random thought

Women like to think, they will keep thinking and thinking, until they think too much of something. Yes, it's true. i still remember that what Russell Peters said that man can actually stop thinking, i mean nothing..for 15 mins. And he was questioning WHY women can't do that. It's hilarious you know, even me myself, i can't do that. Whenever free, i will think..like..everything. Whatever it comes to my mind, 'oh he's handsome..', 'why does she wear like this, it's awful', 'she's actually pretty without any make up on.'..blah blah blah...yea, all the bull shit. Even i can think of something else while i'm writing my blog. yea, that's why women good at multitasking!! hehe...
Something is on my mind and it's kinda bother me, " What makes a guy want to settle down? or is he just playing when he asks a girl to be his girlfriend?', " can a player type guy settle down?", my ex was a real player before we became couple. Well, i didn't really trust him when we first started dating. But i said this to myself, "Give him a chance, and let's give it a try." Ya, it went smooth and it was pretty good. Unfortunately bad things happened, and we both knew that the relationship wasn't working. Hmm, so it was a mutual break up. 
i'm kinda serious person when it comes to relationship. To me, what is the point to start a relationship when both parties refuse to give commitment? Perhaps a casual relationship? hmmmm... or friends with benefits?LOL... well, i'm actually not interested in it but if you're looking one, please tell me before you approach me. HAHA...
I have this in my mind quite a long time--"why do guys become players? " Answers i've got from the internet, because guys are too focused on what they don't have, or what they're missing out on, so for some guys, even the perfect girl for him might not enough for him to change the way he lives his life. Also, some of them have been hurt by girls, and they started to pull up a wall to avoid to get hurt again. I think same goes to girls, get wounded, lack of trust and feeling loss of security in relationship. sigghh... bad case!
I actually find hard to trust a guy, hmmmmm... i think one of the reasons is i'm kinda close with guys, i have more male close friends compare to female. They'll come up with all kinds of criticism and discussion about a girl which disgust me sometimes. So i assume all the guys are same. Acting like a gentleman in front of girls, and then someone else behind. Say something awful... yea, most of them. They're not afraid to say their fascination about girls to me, talk about sex and everything. AND THAT'S WHY I cant trust guys. How could you discuss all these with friends??.. arrhh.. its not respectful!i mean to whoever you're chatting about to your friends. 
Arrh..too much thinking, i'm tired now since its the first day of the week, i should go back home and have a nap ( currently writing this shit at student lounge,LOL) 

Sunday, April 3, 2011

i'm single, so i'm a Queen?

People always say that, single is the best, you can do whatever you want, sleep with whoever you like, go out for a date with whoever you interested in. But for me, sometimes it is not the case. Dating around, i feel..its kinda boring. I don't believe that as a single and available lady, i have a freedom to do whatever i want. The pressure from society and my family is overwhelming me. The criticism and juicy gossip about a girl who dates different guys, kisses around and sleeps around is a common mamak topic, that particular girl's reputation will get ruined just 'click', a second. I seldom hear story about a guy who sleep around.  We label it like " well, men have the desire, so we do not see anything wrong if a guy does so." What?gender bias? 

So a girl makes out with guy- she is a slut. A guy? " F**k man, you're the man!" To guys, its like something they proud of. I always find it unfair but reluctant to talk about it as people tend to think that when i bring it up to the table "owhh.. are you fighting for your 'right' to do thing like that?' NOoooo...I think this is their right to do whatever they want as long as it is not illegal. Well, gender prejudice do exist in the country although Article 8 of Federal Constitution states that no discrimination on the ground of gender. Yea right, no discrimination, someone might claim that " I just voice my opinion, freedom of speech what!", to me saying something bad behind somebody's back is another thing! How do you feel when people say things behind your back? Of course we don't feel good, of course you might argue that what you do is correct. Well, different people have different perspectives, some of them see things differently, we can't please all of the people all of the time. Perhaps ignorance is bliss. 

Single, is not just a status. Its a word to describe people live his/her life to the fullest without depending on others. If i were in Europe, i'd love to be a single lady. But in Asia, hmmm... ya, the situation here is pathetic. Asian tend to be more conservative.